Where are my snacks? Part Deuce.

So when I got home today, I totally felt like you. Not sweaty, but like a fat pig. I realize that it wasn't because I ate a whole lot more than normal, but because I must have had an allergic reaction to one of the many banned foods from my diet this weekend. And today. So I get home and start eating. Not because I'm hungry, but because it's dinnertime. I'm completely full and sleepy, so I lay down for a short nap. When I get up, I feel like it's time to eat some of that dried fruit that I have around the house. Never, ever buy the Trader Joe's Granny Smith Apple Dried Fruit. It's supposed to be crunchy, I think. But it's really a hit or miss with this fruit. The batch I got was packaged nicely (it's a new packaging), but the pieces were either too chewy and gross, or nice and crunchy. Crispy, even. But it's not worth the money to just maybe get a good batch. Consider yourself warned.



You have no idea how much I want to get myself motivated to get up and go to the gym. To make up for it, I try to walk the stairs as much as I can. But three sets of stairs in one day mean nothing when you eat like I do. For today's nutrition, I ate some Jolly Ranchers and Nerds, along with some really sugary gum.

Did I ever tell you about my obsession with flat sandwiches? I think I like them because when I was growing up, my mom used to stuff my sandwiches with about five different kinds of meat, and I used to be embarrassed. I even threw them away sometimes. Back then, I had a bad relationship with food. I just didn't want to eat it. And that brings me to my obsession with flat sandwiches. This includes hamburgers, subs, steak and cheese, or anything that's on bread. Here is an example of the kind of flatness I expect in a sandwich.



Speaking of food, I'm also obsessed with a show on the Travel Channel called Bizarre Foods With Andrew Zimmern. I mean, it's gross, but I love watching people cook. This guy goes to all kinds of different countries and eats all kinds of crazy things. Right now, I'm watching an episide where he's in Vietnam, sampling bull's penis and testicles. Yum!

I must have telepathy when it comes to you. You know what? Before I sat down here to write this, I went into my skin care stash and brought out two new travel-sized Aquaphors.



So yes. Let's meet for lunch. I have an appointment at 11 a.m., so if you want to come late as usual to my neck of the woods, I can meet up. Let's just stay away from Thai.

I wanted to talk to you about the way in which news works around here. This weekend, when we got just a little bit of rain, the breaking news locally was that a third of an inch of rain fell in our area. Are you kidding? Lemonjello and I laughed our asses off. When there's breaking news back home, it's something serious. A murder, an act of terrorism, major traffic delays due to a 40 car pileup on the beltway, or a sniper. Here, it's when the rain falls in September. And what's the deal with the Gas and Electric company? Why do people lose power when the wind blows or when the rain falls? I can't imagine what would happen if there's a major earthquake.

Well, it's close to bedtime for me. I'm completely exhausted because it's Monday and wish that everyday went by as fast as today went for me. I have a ton of stuff to do tomorrow, but it's easy.

Anyway. I have to do my nightly search online for cosmetics, so I'll say goodnight here. More tomorrow. Is 1 p.m. okay for lunch?